Wednesday 26 December 2012

Festive Family Fun



L: I’ll roll. Right, if this is another difficult it’ll be unbelievable… Two. Difficult. Crap! All of ours have been difficult! Sorry Charlotte.

Ch: S’ok… Err, it’s quite hard but not too difficult.

B: Is it an all play?

Ch: Yeh.

B: Chris you’re up.

C: Oh yeh… Ok...

L: Wait for the timer, Chris. 

C: ERR have I drawn anything? No.

L: Wait, wait – it takes ages to run back down – wait… aaand… go! Ok... sea, waves, err… waves -  

M: Beach, shore… bay –

L: Cove –

Ch: YES! Cove!

C: What?! How the f*** did you get that? 

L: An excellent drawing.

C: Show us then. What is that?! Who would get cove from THAT? That is NOT cove.

L: Well obviously it is because we just got it.  We’re just on the same wave length aren’t we team?

B: Ok well, we let you get that. We’ll get the next one.

C: Yeh if they don’t cheat.

L: Right, Mum it’s your go.

M: Pass the dice then, Chris. Four. All play. Ok. Can do.

B: There’s no way we won’t get this, Chris.

L: Mum, you need to give him the card then.

M: Oops oh yeh.

C: Well that’s not fair because you’ve had extra thinking time now.

M: Oh shurrup.

B: Doesn’t matter, Chris - we’ve got this.

L: Don’t draw anything until the timer’s ready…  aaannd… wait… go! Err – 

Ch: House, home – 

L: Garden, two houses, umm... garden – 

C: Garages, parking space, space, err... parking lot?! Err, park - 

L: Garden, field - 

M: Mm, mm –

C: Mum stop making noises. 

M: I’m not!

B: Focus Chris!

L: Garden, space, empty space, plot of land – 

Ch: Land for sale, plot – 

M: Mm - 

C: Stop communicating!

L: Plot, vacant plot –

M: Yes! Vacant plot.

C: Vacant plot?! You were blatantly cheating!!


And so it continued until the girls won. And that is why Dad refuses to play Pictionary.

Thursday 20 December 2012

Festive Feeling Action Plan



Sitting at home feeling sick is PANTS. I’m currently laid-up on the sofa, feeling sorry for myself.  I’m tucked under a duvet cover, massively regretting the miserly bowl of cereals I just attempted and wondering just how long this bug is planning on taking up residence in my stomach. Lovely.

In contrast, right now at school everybody will be enjoying one of the highlights of the year - the much anticipated annual school talent show. The hall will be erupting in cheers and laughter and the kids will be being whipped into an excitable frenzy. And it won’t be long before the renowned teachers’ piece. 

Last year we performed a rap and this year we have made a film of us misbehaving around school. Clambering onto the top of one of the lunch trollies and hurtling down the corridor at full speed was my best bit, especially because a mere 24 hours before, I’d walked that corridor on my best behaviour with an inspector, whose judgement showed she held us in a very high regard don’t you know. The controlled professionalism of the previous day somehow enhanced the excitement of the rebellion and a wonderful juxtaposition ensued… 

Anyway, the film will go down a storm and I hate that I’m missing it. 

I hadn’t realised how much school contributes to my feeling of festive cheer.  Despite the fact that I’ve been staring at our delightfully adorned Christmas tree for the past three days, I feel distinctly lacking in that fuzzy, festive feeling.  The Christmas build up is important.  Posting a photo of my favourite bauble on Facebook didn’t cut the mustard. Perhaps I need some form of Festive Feeling Action Plan to remedy the situation (which obviously shows that I have definitely been struck down with some form of bizarre school withdrawal thing too).

Festive Feeling Action Plan

  1. Switch over to Classic FM
  2. Buy a John Rutter Christmas album and put it on repeat
  3. Delight in the descant line to Hark the Herald Angels Sing
  4. Head home to see the fam
  5. Eat an unnecessary amount of Lindt*
  6. Eat an unnecessary amount of dry roasted peanuts*
  7. Eat an unnecessary amount of cheese*
  8. Watch The Holiday
  9. Watch The Nativity
  10. Start quoting Elf  

*Dependent on stomach resuming normal service

Hopefully that should do it...